The Wizard of Bureaucratic Application Processes
Applying to this Master’s program is a grueling, tedious process. There are endless heaps of red tape and paperwork: not a mechanism for deterring those unworthy, only those unwilling.
The whole process seems backwards to me. I ought to be used to bureaucratic bullshit by now because I’ve had to deal with it my whole life. It’s so unnatural, however, that I don’t see myself ever acclimatizing to such foul weather. In this region, the gutters run with sewage through narrow, crooked streets.
Perhaps this means that I still possess, in some small degree, a sliver of my soul. I should count that as a blessing, but in this process it is more likely a curse. Dorothy made it to Oz, eventually, though the girl who left was not the same one who arrived in a whirlwind, and the path she took was anything but direct. I’ve made a few friends along the way, but friends can only point you in the right direction. You’ve gotta travel the roads on your own two feet.
So I trudge along, my shoes coated with muck, and choke down the impulse to click my heels and wish myself home. It just makes me look silly. Besides, it never works, and my wishes won’t change the system. The only recourse is to do what they say. Fill out this form, submit that application, sign here, file it in the office all the way across town. Wait a week. Hear good news and see it promptly reversed. My own personal battle with the flying monkeys of bureaucracy.
The deadline for the program was today, but it seems like I won’t make it after all, despite my best efforts. We might have made it if the roads weren’t closed on the Base for the snow, but that is out of my hands. More waiting and fruitless emails must entail.
Maybe I’ll play video games, instead. It would certainly make my afternoon more interesting. At least in that world, a soul isn’t an impediment. Plus, if I have to fight flying monkeys I understand their tactics, may even have a badass-lookin’ sword to fight them back.
(The wonderful illustration is by Skottie Young)
One Response to “The Wizard of Bureaucratic Application Processes”
2010/1/26 Wilkies
Master’s program eh? Lemmie know how it goes. good luck with the snow lol, it rained here today.
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